Hump Day Crush: The Grand Gesture

The Grand Romantic Gesture is a key component of most hopelessly romantic fantasies.

Even if you haven’t heard it referred to like that before, you know what I’m talking about. This is the “wouldn’t i tbe great if I…” bit where the “hero” rides in on the big white horse and saves the “fair maiden” he’s crushing on, leading, inevitably, to her falling in love with him.

Or vice versa, as the case may be.

Grand Romantic Gestures are things that work great on paper but rarely pan out in real life. Why? There are three main reasons.

  1. Lack of ability
  2. Lack of opportunity
  3. Reality

Lack of ability comes into play in pretty much all GRG fantasies when translated into reality. Do you actually know how to ride a horse? Do you even own a suit of armor? Can you really fight well enough to triumph over the villain without ending up in traction? If you’re going to make a GRG, at least plan for one you actually stand a chance of being able to pull off. It can be done–I know people who have done so impressively–but it takes planning and preparation. If you honestly feel you are able, then by all means give it a try.

Lack of opportunity is the second biggest issue you’ll run into. If your plan to execute your GRG involves the object of your crush to be doing specific things at specific times in specific places–and they’re not things, times and places that normally occur–you’ve got a problem. For example, if the crux of your plan involves her catching a glimpse of the boquet of flowers as the noon-day sun cascades throught the stained glass window of the church she was baptized in, you may want to re-draft your plan. But, if you’re going to stand up in the restaurant where she works and serenade her, well, that’s probably do-able.

Reality, of course, may have other plans. See, here’s the things about a GRG: there’s a fine line between being Romantic & sweet and being a very creepy or scary stalker. No matter what your intentions or how well you practice and plan, it all comes down to how the other person will perceive the action. If the object of your crush is open to your advances, then all is good. If you at least know her well enough to chat casually on the street, things may be OK. If she doesn’t know you exist until you parachute into her company’s annual picnic, well, you could be looking at legal action.

As with any time when you attempt to move a crush from fantasy into reality, there’s risk. With a GRG, the risk is very high. If it weren’t, it wouldn’t be all that grand, now would it?

What’s the wildest thing someone has done to try to endear themselves to you? What’s the biggest GRG you’ve tried to pull off? Was it a success?

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