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How to Crush Without Being Crushed

The Art of Relationships, Real and Imagined

Category: How to Crush

Even when there’s no crush…

Tweet So I’m getting on the Metro on the way home from some minor shopping after work. It’s crowded, being rush hour and all, and I nudge my way a little bit down the row, letting my eyes drift among the variety of faces I’m presented with. A few seat rows back from where I… Continue reading Even when there’s no crush…

Published May 15, 2007
Categorized as How to Crush Tagged introspection

Hump Day Crush: Intmacy vs. Sex

Tweet Sticking with the whole “lusty month of May” theme, let’s talk a little this week about intimacy and sex. As you may have guessed from last week’s post, I think sex is more than a little over-rated. Too many people focus on it and miss out on what I think are the better things… Continue reading Hump Day Crush: Intmacy vs. Sex

Published May 9, 2007
Categorized as How to Crush Tagged sex

Hump Day Crush: The Lusty Month of May

Tweet Tra la! It’s May! The lusty month of May! That lovely month when ev’ryone goes Blissfully astray. Tra la! It’s here! That shocking time of year When tons of wicked little thoughts Merrily appear! So goes one of the songs from Camelot, the musical version of a section of the Arthurian Legends so well-known… Continue reading Hump Day Crush: The Lusty Month of May

Published May 2, 2007
Categorized as How to Crush Tagged sex

Hump Day Crush: Night, In Shining Armor

Tweet I don’t know how many of you watched (or remember) Ed. It was a show about a New York lawyer (Ed, played by Tom Cavanagh) who came home one day to find his wife in bed with the mailman. This being TV, he packed up and moved back to his old home town. Once… Continue reading Hump Day Crush: Night, In Shining Armor

Published April 25, 2007
Categorized as How to Crush, Lessons Learned

Hump Day Crush: The Character Crush

Tweet The Character Crush–Also known as the Hollywood Crush or the Literary Crush. Can you fall for a fictional character? You bet you can. This is a pure fantasy crush (for most people, except, of course, Katie Holmes–who did have a crush on Tom Cruise when she was much younger). Often, it rides along with… Continue reading Hump Day Crush: The Character Crush

Published February 21, 2007
Categorized as How to Crush

Hump Day Crush: What’s Love Got To Do With It?

Tweet When I was in high school, every year at about this time the business club would hand out a bunch of surveys in homeroom. Those would be collected and, when Valentine’s Day rolled around, for a couple of bucks you’d be able to pick up a “Computer Dating Fun” sheet from the school store… Continue reading Hump Day Crush: What’s Love Got To Do With It?

Published February 14, 2007
Categorized as How to Crush Tagged holidays, love

Hump Day Crush: On the Receiving End

Tweet It’s easy to tell when you have a crush on someone, even if it isn’t easy to admit it. What’s nowhere near as obvious is when someone has a crush on you. We’re all very good at being distracted by our own crushes (or just totally oblivious, like I usually am) to notice when… Continue reading Hump Day Crush: On the Receiving End

Published February 7, 2007
Categorized as How to Crush, Relationships, Lessons Learned

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  • What’s this all about?

    Back in 2005, I was inspired during on online comment exchange to start in on a book about crushes. More specifically, the rules regarding crushes. With a little more reflection, that turned into my idea for How to Crush Without Being Crushed. The main theme to the whole book is that you can learn a lot about yourself from the crushes you get on others. Basically a “how to learn from the relationships you’ll never have and apply that knowledge to the ones you will.” The theory is all anchored in being able to tell fantasy from reality and, at one point or another, being able to detach yourself from your situation enough to clearly see where your influences are coming from and where your wants end and your needs begin. This site is the working document for that theory and a collection of stories, musings and research regarding relationships in general. Praise for WithoutBeingCrushed.com: “I never read any of these series posts before because they were so long, but I’m glad I read this one. It’s wonderful. It reminds me of “The Missing Piece” by Shel Silverstein.” “Very insightful. :) I enjoyed reading.” “This website is a godsend! I’m…

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